As a self-professed personal development junkie, I am always trying to learn something more. One thing that I’ve added into my morning routine (and have become obsessed with) is reading. I never thought of myself as a ‘reader.’
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I wasn’t reading the right books.
It sounds so simple but I had to figure out for myself that I’m just not that into reading fiction books. Sure, I’ve read a few that have been so good, but it’s not the typical book I migrate to. I think it has something to do with my [suspected] neurodivergency (like adhd) and not being able to visualize things. I could be wrong but I’m going with it.
I just want to know more about how our brains and bodies work.
That’s it. That’s the main reason why I am so attracted to personal development books. I am searching for answers to asking myself why I am the way that I am and how can I be an authentic human being.
Other questions that I frequently ask myself are:
How can I be better than I was the day before? The hour before?
How can I build better relationships with those I care about? Deepen my connections?
How can I find others that share my common goals and values?
I have done a lot of self-discovery in 2020 and 2021. A lot of us have! (Go us! btw). I have learned so many things about myself and I’ve peeled back the layers one by one. It’s uncomfortable, it hurts, and it’s ugly. But in that process, I have found a whole new me. One that isn’t afraid to take chances, to speak up for what I believe in, and to set boundaries that should have been there all along.
I told someone the other day that I feel like an adult. And that person asked me what I mean by that and I thought about it on a deep level. Being an adult (to me), means feeling empowered to make any decision in your journey based on how it feels to you, not what others expect you to do.
And here is what I mean by that.
I have spent my life making decisions based on what I thought others expected of me. I valued others’ opinions SO much that I paralyzed myself (oh, the irony there) on making decisions based on what I truly wanted. I also was taught to suppress all my emotions – if something was wrong, don’t say anything, just ignore it. So basically I navigated life trying not to feel anything (pushing myself away from others) while relying on others to make decisions for me. I was letting life happen TO me instead of living based on what was best FOR me.
Let me tie this back into reading, I promise there is a connection.
During the process of getting to know me, I needed information in order to rewrite my narrative. When I talk about “my narrative” I am referring to the story that plays in my head. It’s the thoughts and stories that I tell myself. I’ve learned that most of this story came from others. I needed to find and learn about other narratives in order to find the one that’s right for me.
This is where books come in. I started reading any book I came across that was recommended by people I follow for personal development information. It started with Atomic Habits by James Clear. This book truly changed how I viewed my habits and how I talked to myself about my habits. There were a couple of books by Jen Sincero that I absolutely adored. Her style of writing is so witty – warning does include curse words (which I love) – but gets the point across in the most loving way.
There were a few more books as well, but let’s talk about what I’m currently reading.
Y’all I picked up my first book (or two) by THE Brene Brown! Holy Moly why did I not do this sooner? I’m just about halfway through this book and I have been blown away in every single chapter. The book, The Gifts of Imperfections, talks about what it means to live wholeheartedly and how our imperfections are what brings us the deepest connections and sense of belonging. I highly, highly recommend it.
It’s teaching me how to be vulnerable with the people that have earned that. Also, it’s giving me examples of what that looks like. I have to admit, it’s not as scary as it feels to me. Being vulnerable doesn’t take the hurt away. It allows the hurt to turn into comfort in knowing you are being true to yourself. It’s teaching me a different way of living. A more peaceful one than I have now.
I have “cleaned up” my mind so much that it’s snowballing into other areas of my life. My career has leveled up in the past couple of months and I feel a renewed passion for helping the spinal cord injury community. Chris and I keep growing closer and closer and we are more in love with each other than ever. And, the decisions I make around my nutrition and exercise are changing.
I have also put together an amazing team of professionals.
Reading isn’t my only tool for personal development. I go to therapy about once a month, I’m working with a mindfulness coach that is teaching me how to live consciously and a team of doctors. I still maintain a follow-up schedule with my spinal cord injury specialist doctor. In addition, I also see a team of docs at Inspired Chiropractic & Wellness. In this office, I am receiving typical chiropractic adjustments, as well as, massage therapy, acupuncture, and just started a journey with functional medicine.
For the first time in my life, I am truly excited about the future. And while I cannot visualize it, the feelings I get when talking and thinking about the future are that of love and peace. I hope this inspires you to start your self-discovery journey.
If you would like more information on anything I spoke about here, leave me some feedback either here – below this post, e-mail me (thewheellifeblog@gmail.com), or on any of my social media platforms! (FB/IG/TW/TT @wheellifeblog and Snapchat @megsh8). I would love to hear from you and what I can do to help. If there is ANYTHING that you want to hear about – please let me know! I can’t do any of this without YOU, so I would love to connect with you!
Let’s keep those happy thoughts, productivity, and self-care going! Until next time, live honestly, passionately, and with kindness! Take care!
